two little lovelies

Backstage at Dior.


futuristic fair-trade

Star Trek: The Next Generation meets American Apparel. As Four, SS 06.


trend: canary

Darling yellow, you're a bird. Won't you warble us a little tune?

Brian Reyes



may we suggest: nina ricci

Short, sweet, and deliciously red.

Why does Jessica get all the best outfits?




Coach handbag, Style No: 115
Imported straw with python, suede, leather and canvas trim.

Imported straw. Terribly impressive and all, but what about the python? Please tell us it's not homegrown.

Outsourcing snake is just fine by us.


the original heatherette

Vivienne Westwood Spring 2006.

Do you know anyone who would actually wear any of this? Wait - don't answer that question. Let's let the fashion victims remain anonymous, shall we?

We'll admit that the show began with a few interesting pieces, but it quickly descended into the trash compactor. And so, here we do a little dumpster diving.

Just rolled out of bed. Took the sheets with her.

Disgruntled Mimes Anonymous

On the lam from the senior's rest home.

Taking out the trash.




Three reasons why we love punchy little gloves:

1. Traceless escape when exiting the scene of a crime.
2. Lends instant lady-like grace and credibility to any outfit.
3. They're a fabulous excuse to inject screaming hits of colour into your spring wardrobe.






Marie Antoinette meets Joan of Arc meets Lanvin 2006. The Shoe as organic/futuristic weaponry.


how embarassing

Didn't think it was possible to suffer a camel toe when wearing a dress?

Think again.

Akris SS 06

Dear girl, you have our sympathies.



tall latte

Two things worth noting about this photo:

1. Jessica's hat is a lovely Starbucks shade of green. This is either serendipitous happenstance or indicative of an obsessive/compulsive need to coordinate with the label on her latte.

2. The accomplished, tough-guy, elder rocker is stuck holding the shopping bag and beverages while the teenage fashion model looks on disdainfully.



A heartening observation from the runway: even the most beautiful of women can have the ugliest of feet.



good girl gone bad

Chanel for Spring: vetements for the good girl gone very, very bad.

Hell yes, this is acid wash.

Not your Grandmother's lace pantaloons.

They call her Knuckles.

Rocking the handbag like she knows it's a weapon.

You can put the girl in the dress, but you can't put the panties on the girl.



Although we didn't really need any further proof that myspace is a cesspool of poseurs and hangers-on, we couldn't resist the humour in this. Seems that Gemma Ward has got herself a couple of myspace imposters.

Best quotes from the comments: "maybe one day we could do a runway show together." "what are yer plans for the weekend?" [sic].

See imposter #1 here and imposter #2 here.

Gemma, u r sooooo hot.


tasty treats

Some tasty treats for spring from Celine. These are all basic variations on the same outfit, but you know, if it ain't broke, and all that jazz.

We're craving caramel for spring. Love the flowy skirt and the ankle strap shoes. The girly factor is tempered by the leather jacket. C'est bon.

We were just about finished with the beaded necklaces, and then we saw this. Super big and mildly offensive. Like a slap in the face. We love.

Half-jacket, layered shirts, voluminous skirt. If you can manage to work a half jacket into something respectable, surely you can do anything.

Designer Ivana Omazic: cute!


trend: patent

When leather is glazed and laquered, everyday colors take on an unknown intensity.

Black becomes majestically slick.

Handbags look like pieces of candy, and Marc's Louis Vuitton minidress becomes the candy wrapper.

Miu Miu heels and Fendi handbag

Boot and Shoe brought to you by Prada



dream of californication

The emergent romance between Anthony Kiedis and Jessica Stam takes us right back to the glory days of Axl Rose and Stephanie Seymour.

Kisses and hugs, dolls.



We're completely crushing on this fantastic fabulous gown.

We just hope Renee Zellweger doesn't go and wear it to the Oscars. We'd be crushed.



kiss kiss

We're intrigued to see that Marc Jacobs and our darling Ms. Stam seem to have an on-again, off-again kind of relationship. They were most definitely on the outs during the FW 06 shows (see this atrocity). But just a season earlier, it was all love and patent pink kisses as Marc benevolently dressed her up in (arguably) the finest number in his collection for Vuitton. Here's Jessica as an airline stewardess from the year 2020:


Loving the pink patent. Marc sure knows how to find his way into a young girl's heart.



Vuitton does naughty:

Vuitton does nice:

Photos are LV SS06




This, we believe, is a look they call jailbait (ie. fourteen year old virgin/whore).

We'll pass on these, thankyouverymuch.

Photos above are D&G SS06


sweet caramel

We're mulling over these clean, sweet offerings from Burberry Prorsum for Spring. While we usually wouldn't fall for something so safe, we must admit that the warm, caramel tones have put a toffee-flavoured spell on us. We love the idea of looking so effortlessly relaxed and yet so meticulously put-together. We love the soft color that floats through this collection. We love the easy little caps, the black platform peep-toes, and the nude round-toes.



extremely natural

More and more, we're noticing an emerging trend in footwear. Equal parts haute couture and medieval torture device, these shoes blend natural materials, extreme height, and extreme style. We love the juxtaposition of natural form (chunky, glossy wood, sexy curves, luxe leathers) with pure sexual edge.

On a strictly hypothetical level, we can imagine that these would make fabulous S&M props. Strap on the shoes and crack your crocodile leather whips, ladies.

Photos are: Prada, Dior, Chloe, Lanvin



granny sui

We love Anna Sui, we promise we do. But she seems to have caught a terrible case of JonathanAdler-itis, because her Fall 06 collection was riddled with patterns and fabric better suited for broadloom carpet than for couture. Pass the Dramamine, honey, we're dizzy just looking at these. Some of the more voluminous pieces would make great maternity wear for seniors, but unfortunately, we've yet to meet a pregnant 65-year old.

jonathan adler wants his coat back

cute maternity wear

And don't get us started on the roll-away suitcases. We're all for luxury luggage, but you won't ever find us carpet-bagging through the airport with one of these gems.

granny's off to mexico for the winter

Whereas Marc Jacobs is often lauded for channelling a grandma's closet sort of vibe, this collection just straight out smacks of granny.